by Jill Ragar Esfeld
jill.esfeld@theleaven.org
LEAWOOD — “I was the last man on the planet that was interested in foster care,” said Michael Shirley. “I went from disinterest to, now, I’m passionate about it.”
Shirley, a member of Church of the Nativity Parish in Leawood, was on a self-directed retreat almost two years ago asking the Holy Spirit for guidance when he got a clear message that he would soon be meaningfully involved in a new ministry.
The following Sunday during Mass, Susie Boster, who launched the Foster Care Ministry at Church of the Nativity in 2020, made her annual appeal to inform parishioners of the great need for foster parents and support for the ministry.
“Michael came up to me [after Mass],” she recalled. “And he said, ‘I feel like the Holy Spirit tapped me on the shoulder and said, “Pay attention. You’re supposed to be involved in this.”’
“He has a background as a recruiter for high-level positions, so his talent is connecting people.”
Boster had been praying for help. She told Shirley she was particularly struggling to find handymen that could get foster homes ready for the certification process.
Shirley didn’t hesitate.
“Susie,” he said, “you don’t know me very well, but let me make one phone call and solve the problem.”
He called John Brown, head of Christmas in October at Church of the Nativity, who said his group could help.
With that problem solved, Shirley turned to Boster and said simply, “What’s next?”
Boster knew her prayers were answered.
Shirley has since involved many other men in Nativity’s foster care effort, particularly the Knights of Columbus.
Despite the great need for foster families in the archdiocese, not everyone is called to foster. The Knights are stepping up to support those who can.
They help with home improvement projects, deliver large items, accompany female volunteers in unsafe areas, provide meals and mentor young people.
“The guys at Nativity have really embraced it,” said Shirley. “These are men who are retired, they have energy, they have skills, they have trucks — and they’re looking for something meaningful to do — not just play golf for another day.”
When he first approached the Knights, Shirley made it clear that supporting foster care was more than a service project; it was a response to the core principles of the organization.
“I told them the Knights were founded for the express purpose of helping widows and orphans,” said Shirley. “So guys, if you’re a Knight, you’re obligated to get involved.”
Shirley’s push to involve more men in foster care fit beautifully with the philosophy of foster ministry and pro-life coordinator Kathy White: Everybody can do something.
“Michael makes it smoother for foster families so they will have support — supplies if needed, meals if needed — everything we can do to wrap around that family so they can do the hard stuff.
“The Catholic community does that well anyway — that wraparound support.”
Boster agreed.
“We can all do a little something,” she said. “Can you install a baby gate or a handrail? Could you deliver some beds for me? Could you build playground equipment? Could you mentor a teen?
“The Knights have said those are doable things. They have been awesome.”
The Knights of Nativity also organize an annual respite night, when foster parents come together for dinner and kids gather for organized games. And they host a special “Christmas with Santa” event.
Shirley has now reached out to the Knights of Columbus in St. Michael the Archangel Parish in Leawood and they’re enthusiastically embracing the mission as well.
“St. Michael Knights are on fire — they’re all in,” he said. “And both of these pastors — not only do they support us strongly, but they’ve been praying for our success.”
Archbishop Joseph F. Naumann is also behind Shirley’s efforts, even recently asking if he would be willing to help other parishes in the archdiocese who have foster ministries.
Again, Shirley didn’t hesitate.
“I’ve been called to do that,” he said.
And not just in this archdiocese. Shirley’s intention is to continue making connections, parish by parish, diocese by diocese — across the nation if that’s what the Holy Spirit leads him to do.
“Michael really is a visionary,” said White. “He’s connected and has ideas and he wants to mobilize men.
“What he’s doing is great and I’m so excited.”
It’s a two-way street for Shirley. His involvement in the foster care ministry has been rewarding and he’s seen a change in the men he’s invited to join him.
“What foster care does, it softens your heart,” he said. “One guy told me, ‘It’s abundantly clear to me, when I’m involved in foster care, I’m doing God’s work.’”
And an important part of that work in Boster’s eyes is spreading the faith.
“It’s a launching pad to evangelization,” she said. “We’re not trying to recruit anyone to be Catholic, but we’re showing them what it means to be Catholic.”
