by Father Mark Goldasich
Let me start with a story.
Jed Harris was a Broadway producer and director. One day, convinced he was losing his hearing, he went to a specialist who gave him a thorough checkup.
At the end of his exam, the doctor pulled out a gold watch and asked, “Can you hear this ticking?” Harris replied, “Of course!”
The specialist then walked to the door of the exam room, held up the watch again and asked, “Now can you hear it?” Harris concentrated and said, “Yes, I can hear it clearly.”
The doctor then walked into the hallway and asked, “How about now? Can you hear it?” Harris answered, “Yes.”
The specialist came back into the room and said, “Mr. Harris, there’s nothing wrong with your hearing. You just don’t listen!” (Story adapted from “Illustrations Unlimited,” edited by James S. Hewett.)
Sadly, many of us suffer from the same affliction: We hear others, but we just don’t listen. That one word stood out to me from the Gospel reading about the Transfiguration last Sunday. The voice from the cloud said, “This is my beloved Son, with whom I am well pleased; listen to him.”
One Sunday years ago, I asked the congregation during my homily, “Where did that first reading come from?” I wish I’d had a camera to record the panicked looks on the faces of so many. Good gracious, we’d just heard the reading a few minutes earlier but didn’t listen to it.
I get it. There are a slew of distractions during Mass: the fidgety child that can’t be consoled; people getting up to use the restroom; a loud cough or sneeze that drowns out all other sounds; our constantly buzzing thoughts that range from “What in the world is that kid wearing?” to “I wonder if there will be a long wait at the restaurant after Mass.” How often we hear sounds but don’t listen to words.
Even the disciples were guilty of this. How many times in the Scriptures is Jesus stunned that, after all he’s taught them, they still don’t “get it.”
Maybe a great Lenten discipline this year might be to fast from speaking so much and learn to become a better listener. The website Seedling suggests a 70/30 rule: Listen 70% of the time and talk 30%. Other ideas include:
• Avoid interrupting. This was a key practice at the Synod on Synodality. Participants sat at round tables in groups of eight to 10 people. The first time around, each person was given a set amount of time to express his or her opinions on a particular question and no one could interrupt them. This way, everyone would have the opportunity to be listened to.
• Be curious. Ask people questions, especially open-ended ones that can’t be answered with a simple “yes” or “no.” Then, listen attentively to the responses.
• Listen to people’s tone of voice and body language as well.
I started with a story, and now I’ll end with one:
A nurse on the pediatric ward, before listening to kids’ chests, would plug the stethoscope into their ears and let them listen to their own heart. Their eyes would light up with awe.
One child in particular, 4-year-old David, gave a unique and unforgettable response. As the nurse gently tucked the stethoscope into his ears and placed the disk over his heart, she said, “Listen. What do you suppose that is?”
David drew his eyebrows together in concentration at the mysterious tap-tap-tapping deep in his chest. Then his face broke out in a huge grin as he asked, “Is that Jesus knocking?”
May we spend time this Lenten season heeding God’s command to listen . . . especially to Jesus knocking in each of our hearts.
