by Moira Cullings
moira.cullings@theleaven.org
SHAWNEE — Only one thing could get Jill Ragar Esfeld through an hour-long eye procedure while wide awake and lying still.
“I would start saying my rosary,” she said. “And I would say to myself, ‘Don’t think about anything else. Just say your rosary and worry about it when you’re done — with all 20 decades.’
“I would do that, and it got me through. It really did.”
The rosary ultimately carried her through four more procedures on the same eye attempting to recover her eyesight after both her retina and macula detached.
When her latest one earlier this month couldn’t recover her vision completely, she handled it in true Esfeld fashion — in gratitude for her good eye.
A freelance writer and photographer for The Leaven and parishioner at Good Shepherd Parish in Shawnee, Esfeld hasn’t let the challenges she’s faced over the past six months get in the way of the work she loves.
Life changing
Esfeld has used her distinct talent for writing to craft countless stories about the people of northeast Kansas for more than two decades.
“Jill has been one of our most dedicated freelancers for more than 20 years,” said Leaven production manager Todd Habiger. “I consider her part of the staff.”
The work has deepened her own spirituality.
“Because of my work for The Leaven, all the people that I’ve met and the things that I’ve seen by doing these stories,” said Esfeld, “you could never convince me that there’s no God.
“If somebody said to me, ‘There’s no God,’ it’d be like saying, ‘There’s no McDonald’s.’
“And I’d be like, ‘There’s one on every corner. How can you not see that?’”
Her own story
Esfeld’s journey to Catholic news writing began when she shared her own story with The Leaven.
She was enjoying a career as a technical writer when her son became sick with Kawasaki disease, a rare, life-threatening vasculitis, while he was in first grade.
“I had to quit writing because his aftercare required a lot of doctor’s appointments,” said Esfeld.
But she wasn’t ready to stop working.
While in college, Esfeld had prayed that God would help her make a career out of one of her degrees — technical writing and art.
It turns out God gave her the opportunity to use both.
She put her artistic talent to use, creating images of the Madonna for school auctions, and sold many more to individuals upon request.
With the money raised, “I decided to start a children’s program in the inner city doing arts and crafts with children in a homeless shelter,” said Esfeld.
“I went there every week and took kids that needed service hours with me to help out,” she added.
The Leaven heard about the program and published an article about it. When managing editor Anita McSorley found out Esfeld was a writer, she asked if she’d be interested in freelancing.
“The funny thing about it is when I was in college, I prayed [for the intercession of] St. Francis de Sales,” said Esfeld. “He was the patron saint of the Catholic press, but because I was going to be a writer, that was the only saint I knew that had something to do with writing.
“And then I ended up working for the Catholic press. It was almost like he was all along going, ‘I’m going to get you.’”
Perfect fit
Esfeld’s style turned out to be exactly what McSorley was looking for.
“Jill tells stories the way people like to read them and in a way that matches The Leaven’s style to a T,” said McSorley.
“As a writer and interviewer, she leads with her heart, and she uses her skills to take us into the lives of Catholics of all stripes,” she added.
Esfeld’s favorite beats are human interest and social justice.
“I don’t think people realize what [Catholics] do behind the scenes — all the laypeople that are out there making a real difference in the world,” she said.
“I love to report on that stuff, on people that have been impacted by the Catholic Church in terms of seriously changing their lives because of the charity and the work they do,” she continued. “I love telling those stories.”
Pushing the limits
Esfeld’s husband Jerry is impressed by her ability to convey such powerful stories.
“Her intros [to articles] amaze me — how she can come up with that out of the interview she had,” he said.
Jerry has witnessed his wife work multiple writing jobs over the years.
“I would say she enjoys The Leaven probably more than any of them,” he said. “She’s a very spiritual person. And she’s dedicated.”
He recalls multiple times his wife pushed herself to the limits, including covering Catholic Charities’ Snow Ball gala just one day after getting two shots in her eye.
Esfeld said the severity of her eye issues is rare. The problem worsened while visiting her daughter and her family in Oregon for two weeks in August 2025.
“By the time I got back to Kansas City and to my eye doctor, the damage was pretty severe,” she said. “I was pretty much blind in that eye.”
After each procedure, she’s had to lie face down for weeks at a time, only getting up for short breaks, and has had to avoid reading.
Fortunately, she has 20/20 vision in her dominant eye, so she’ll be able to continue her photography.
And despite the physical limitations she’s experienced, her work ethic has never faltered.
“She’s always been willing to take on tough assignments,” said Habiger, “and I’m amazed that she’s been willing and able to continue to work as she’s battled eye issues.
“It’s a testament to her dedication to The Leaven and the people of the archdiocese.”
Compassion from suffering
“They say God doesn’t prevent you from suffering,” said Esfeld. “And I believe that, because I’ve suffered plenty.
“But he promises to be with you through the suffering, and that’s the key. If you pray, if you believe, he will be with you and get you through it.”
She sees her recent suffering as an opportunity to grow.
“Anything you go through like that, it teaches you compassion,” said Esfeld. “And that’s all we’re here to learn — love and compassion. That’s all you can take with you.”
Her work in Catholic journalism has solidified that belief.
“That’s such a gift for the kind of work we do is to be reaffirmed in our faith every day when we see people living it successfully and making a difference in the world,” said Esfeld.
“Coincidence after coincidence — you can call it that,” she said. “But I say it’s miracles after miracles.”
