by Jeanne Gorman
Special to The Leaven
WICHITA — Theirs might not have been a conventional big, happy, Irish Catholic family. But it was big, happy and Irish, nevertheless.
Shawn McKnight lost his father in an accident when he was only 18 months or so old, recalls his sister Cindy. But their mother Mary eventually remarried Gary Schaffer. (Both are now deceased.) And Schaffer became Shawn’s father in every way that mattered.
In the ensuing 20 years, the Schaffers welcomed seven more children, giving Shawn one sister, Cindy Bergkamp (about four years his junior), and six brothers, including Jeremy Schaffer (about nine years younger). Growing up, they lived in the Wichita area and for a time in Seattle, while their father was employed by Boeing.
Mary and Gary were devout Catholics and passed along the Catholic faith to their children — a true domestic church. Most significantly to Cindy and Jeremy, their parents not only believed in the real presence of Jesus in the Eucharist, but emphasized this core teaching of the faith to their children.
Cindy believes that emphasis had an impact on Shawn, as well as the other children. They were always taught to “trust in God” as well. Cindy thanks the Lord now, for giving them all such faith-filled parents.
In addition to his brothers and sister — Cindy said they never thought in terms of “half” or “step” siblings; they were always just brothers and sister — Shawn was also surrounded by a loving extended family, including two uncles who were doctors that were especially influential in his life.
The extended family also included Shawn’s paternal grandmother, who welcomed his siblings into her life. Not only did Shawn spend summers with her back in Wichita when the family was living in Seattle, but Cindy remembers them staying with her in Wichita as well, where Shawn’s grandmother treated his siblings like her own grandchildren.
As the sibling closest to Shawn in age, Cindy had stronger memories and impressions of him as a youth than her younger brothers. In fact, she always felt that Shawn was looking out for her. They moved back to Wichita when Shawn was a junior in high school. And although she never told him this, he shaped her value system growing up.
“My earliest memories of doing right or wrong always have gone back to him because he held me to a higher standard than I held myself,” she said. “Because of Shawn, I wanted to do better. . . . I don’t think he even realized he was doing that.
“He was a good role model for us,” she added. “We just thought he was being really stubborn but I think he just knew . . . this is what we were supposed to do. And . . . he showed us that ‘you can achieve whatever you put your head into.’”
Jeremy recalls that it was when they were living on a ranch near Lake Cheney outside of Wichita that his brother discovered his love of hunting. They would hunt for rabbits and any fowl in the area like quail, pheasant or ducks.
But Cindy said it was the parishioners of St. Mark Church in Colwich, where he was pastor for a time, who took the young priest “under their wings” and taught him the ropes of hunting.
Shawn loved to go trout fishing with his uncles, one of whom lives in Montana. He also enjoys watching hockey, although he never played. Jeremy remembers him taking a group of parishioners to a local hockey game, cautioning them not to listen too closely to the banter of the other fans.
According to Cindy, Shawn had a plan for his life. Perhaps influenced by his uncles, he always said he intended to be a surgeon. Toward that goal, he worked himself through college at the University of Dallas. He was so focused on medicine, she never expected him to be a priest. In fact, she laughed when she learned of it. Jeremy agreed. It was a shock to the family because they all assumed he would pursue a medical career.
No one tried to talk him out of the priesthood, however. They understood that once Shawn made up his mind, that was it. One of his uncles had attended the seminary before he became a doctor so there was a bit of family history with the religious life.
As a youth, Shawn exhibited an artistic side as well. Jeremy recalls going to Shawn’s piano recitals. In fact, their mother thought that he might be talented enough to attend The Julliard School in New York. Besides playing classical music on the piano, Shawn could play very well by ear, which Jeremy admired.
Jeremy also recalls that Shawn played soccer and laughingly recounts how all the kids had a bit of an Irish temper, although they all outgrew it. Jeremy looked up to Shawn, finding him very detail-oriented and capable of excelling at anything.
There is a long history of military service in the family, which includes their dad Gary who was in the Army before joining Boeing. Their maternal grandfather was in the Navy. Several of the Schaffer siblings served in the Navy and Marines as well — some for a career — and spent time in some of the world’s hot spots. Jeremy believes the family had “really good” guardian angels protecting them.
Even though the siblings have lived all over the world, those who can have made the effort to get together at least once a year with their families and extended family, even to this day. They enjoy being around each other.
Jeremy is an unabashed admirer of his big brother, calling him “a fantastic, intelligent and talented person who has been on a mission since being called to the priesthood.”
“He preaches the truth in a very upfront, direct way,” said his brother. “He is a great shepherd.”
With endorsements like that, it’s not hard to see how this extremely close-knit Catholic family together nurtured, modeled and supported Shawn into becoming who he is today — the new shepherd of the Archdiocese of Kansas City in Kansas.
